Like a cigarette in youre bed

I'M OUT OF CIGS!!!!!!

could my life get any worse at 1:40 am (I know, I don't have one thats why I am up this late)
eventhough it sounds horrible I did find out something nice: Youre finger nails are quite flammable. You should try it, they melt and it stinks and you'll feel great.

Oh and today I saw a chihuahua. I had a sudden urge to step on it and hear its little scull crack under my feet. Besides that I am doing quite well. Except for the fact that I am frustrated about gayness. I figured out, that, eventhough I might be one myself, I don't like 99.99% of them. Where is my man that will drink pints of beer-play WoW- listen to Sonic youth-go to punk/hardcore party's with me and on the other hand is sometimes willing to go to electric party's full of fashion guys and gays (to laugh about most of them (not all, because I can be one as well quite occasionally) and watch spirited away? (no I will not make you listen to Madonna)

Maybe it's just me. But at least I already know him, and believe he must be like a cigarette in my bed. (which is: good)

good night.

Is this a store for gay's?

After a period of absence, it was time for me to come back, with a bang. And boy do I have some news for you!

I QUIT MY JOB!!!

(so, no more discounts guuurlllls)

No more me saying:

"It's not too tight, it's just the way it fits"
"No the golden legging doesn't make you look slutty"
"I'm not drunk, I don't smell like alcohol"

No more frustrated gays trying to steal Butt magazines or throwing money at me screaming I am stuck up, and no more wulla's looking for 'Die truitje met die diepe V hals'.

(It wasn't all bad)

So now I need to start selling my organs, dance for dolla's, do naughtier things for dolla's or just get a new job. anyone?

X

p.s. the title : http://jezebel.com/341625/american-apparel-will-make-you-look-like-a-fat-hooker

(very funny)

OFF on schedule

Ok ok, the title is so not original but what the fuck!

last saturday it was time for some model fun at offschedule. I walked (read: stood and looked angry above a mirror) for Saskia Schoenmaker. The clothes were awesome, the guys were fun, but boy was the technical element of the offschedule crew ever bad. When the fuck are you gonna learn bitches, just make a fucking long runway and let people walk over it, and next time put some good lights up too!

nevertheless I couldn't keep it from you, so enjoy. or not.

How to get the most out of youre €!

Dollar dollar bill ya'll!

What does one do when he/she realizes there is only 50 euro's left for 8 days? I mean, as awkward as it may sound you gotta eat something right?!

Let me tell you!

1. First you put on youre new Marc Jacobs shoes (which are the reason you don't have money)
2. You get youre ass outside in the freezing rain and wind (Don't we just love the Netherlands)
3. You enter youre favorite place in the hole wide world named Albert Heijn to buy..............

EUROSHOPPER!!!!!!!!

God how I love you for making us humans smart enough to develop a brand like this. I've already told you about the sausage rolls once, but no it's time for more.

Euro shopper actually enables you to make a meal that will last you 2 days for only €2,50!

Ingredients:

1. EuroShopper canned mushrooms (39 cents)
2. EuroShopper spaghetti (40 cents)
3. EuroShopper passeta pommodori (29 cents)
4. Euroshopper ground beef (112 cents, depending on the weight that is)
5. A zucchini (aka courgette)onions and some garlic (0 cents, if you steal them, which is easy, just take a big bag and slide them in, no one will notice and if they do you get a free ride in a police car hurray!)
6. Basil (0 cents, just snap of a few leafs from the fresh plants they sell and put them in youre bag)
   

All this makes the most fabulous Spaghetti bolognese ala Euroshopper, and everybody knows the tasty sensation of a value meal right?

So get youre asses over to AH and embrace EuroShopper, because against the power of this brand there can be no victory (LOTR, know youre classics)

You can't deny it, even the graphic design of the logo is absolutely breathtaking.

I hope you all have a thrifty day!

p.s. Marc Jacobs if you read this, know that I hate you. (said in the manner Whitney Houston would say it to Bobby Brown)

X

How to demolish an entire civilization and still feel good about youreself.

Ok. First of all, don't mind the video, it's about the song.



Many things to say, don't feel like saying it, because I am kind of (a lot) opposed to talking about personal feelings on blogs.

This song by LCD soundsystem is nice. You should all like it. And the clip has some kind of hypnotising LSD effect (LCD-LSD omg I'm so good with words) and we all figured out by now that waching a video to experience some transcendence is way better than taking that chemical shit.

O. I'd also like to attend you all to Mr Dash Snow. The man of the pictures. They make excellent gifts. Nobody I know has ever captured the beauty of the dutch/uk oil company of shell so well.

Ok, gotta stop now before I start getting to poetic.

x

Feeding frenzy!

OK! A quicky then.

I heart Mc Donalds, who doesn't love a hamburger made of 2nd class separator meat and some nice fries soaked in unethically produced sunflower oil with traces of animal fat!

watch and learn:

First comes the pleasure, then the shame. Don't go all super size on me now guys, or I'll send you to fatcamp and you'll die.

x

Quality cooking time

T' is the season to be jolly. And boy am I ever. And Christmas is a time for remembrance according to our great example and leader, well for some of us that is, Queen Elizabeth II.

This made me think about this one little evening I had with friends about half a year ago. Under the enjoyment of some booze, food etc. We had a movie marathon. One of the movies was the alltime family favorite: The bride of chucky.




I posted it three times to make this dawn on you: As you can see, some quality cooking time with the family can be quite an enjoyment, but also a risk, so please be careful overthere with youre family dolly's! Because I'd love to see you all back alive and unspoiled in a day or 2.